Words From Our Sponsor: A Jeweler Commissions a Novel
In an arrangement believed to be a first for the book industry, Bulgari has
paid British author Fay Weldon for a prominent place in her new book.
- New York Times, 2001/9/3

***

Morning emptiness:
an ache, a yearning, a void
until McMuffin.

Through toil and struggle
you and your Secret never
let them see you sweat.

Lunch - and life - too short
for dreary Weldon novel;
verse with Taco Bell.

Refreshing dollops
of healthy meditations
with TCBY.

Struggle, sweat and strain -
calling, faxing, emailing -
sustained by Starbuck's.

The day's battles won,
floating home as on a cloud,
soothing Lexus ride.

Family awaits,
soft hugs and relaxation:
Johnny Walker straight.

The home-front news is good:
your children's Dell computers
have made them scholars.

Dinnertime brings peace,
silence formed from chewing beef -
it's what's for dinner.

Day is done at last,
woman, man and mattress joined,
Perfect Sleepers all.

Drifting off, you dream
of products yet unpurchased;
tomorrow beckons.

***

Here in poetry
your advertising dollar
soars on eagles' wings.

Through artful placement
viewed by millions, products flow
like ice-cold Pepsi.

Haiku sponsorship
ensures your message reaches
haiku-reading rich.

Your message rises,
drifts, as if all time had stopped
except Bulgari.

For less than one book,
ten poems purchase product
immortality.

Harried businessmen,
too rushed to read Fay's novel,
gobble verse at lunch.

While once I wondered
how to reach my customers,
haiku shows the path.

Placement deals like these
can never last forever.
Thank yourself, call now.